For those that know me, you know it is one of the first questions I ask. “How can I help you today?” And it is always one of the most impactful parts of the conversation because it helps guide the relationship to ensure that I feel I am giving everything I can to help the other person.

I’m not sure if you have had the experience of wishing that you could do more for a situation that has passed, but I know that all too many times, it happens. I would challenge you to take a thoughtful moment to take advantage of helping a situation before it happens. You might ask how you can stop something that has not happened yet, to which I would reply, “That’s the point.” The idea of helping a situation not happen is exactly why you asked the question.

Most of the time in life, if you are careful and observant enough, you might be able to stop that thing from happening. It is not an exact science, nor is this some philosophical experiment. It is also not a guarantee, but nothing in life is.

I enjoy the time I spend practicing the martial art of Brazilian jujitsu. Although I grew up wrestling, which affords me some basic skills that others may lack, the ability to see ahead in the situation before somebody chokes me and puts me to sleep is less about wrestling and more about addressing the current situation. Experience levels have something to do with understanding which sequences might work out. Still, it’s more about the ability to pivot and quickly assess where things are and where things may lead in the immediate, near, and longer term. The ability to resequence that situation over and over in the middle of physical combat is an exhilarating and exhausting experience. Still, I enjoy doing it because it keeps me remembering that while I have room to breathe, I still have room to think. It also teaches the concept of patience, peacefulness, and timing. These kinds of things transfer over into helping others.

Sometimes, when you ask someone, if they need help, they may refuse it, even though you see that help is required, which requires patience. Sometimes when you ask someone if they need help, and they become angry with you through no fault of your own, you must remain peaceful to try to help again at some point in the future. And then, of course, the timing of asking someone if they need help can make a universe of difference.

I encourage you to look at yourself and your day to see who else you can help and practice patience, peacefulness, and timing. I look forward to hearing any stories or feedback from your personal experience of how you’ve helped others and how that is helped you .

All the best.

Larry B.